So you know all of my previous posts about bedrest not really being that bad?? This week I feel like that is a load of crap! Yes, folks, it has officially happened . . . yesterday at 30w4d I hit the wall. Thanks to all of those I frantically called yesterday looking for support (and those who, like a psychic, somehow knew to call me to check in on me) -- I am happy to say that I made it through the day. I don't know why it hit me yesterday or what is different, but I was really starting to get claustrophobic and have mini panic attacks -- i.e. if I watch the "Today" show or HGTV for one more minute I am going to go insane and that every room in my house was closing in on me!! I want to again stress that I know that I am VERY blessed to have been able to stay at home this entire time and I am very grateful for cable TV & having a laptop (a friend of mine from college was in the exact same boat as me last fall and didn't have either . . . so I feel guilty complaining!). I think part of my problem this week is that I don't have any doctor's appointments -- which I can't believe I am even saying! Since I've been staying the same at each of my appointments, my OB told me last week I didn't have to come back for 2 weeks, which originally made me excited because every week it has been like a roller coaster -- will they send me back to the hospital or do I get to come back home? So I was excited to think about not having to go through that for two whole weeks! But then it occurred to me that it would also mean that I would not be able to leave the house for two whole weeks -- yikes! I guess it is a blessing & a curse!
So I'm trying now to focus on a few fun / positive things. My cousin is going to come for a "slumber" party tomorrow night while Tim is traveling for work. Many of my girlfriends are also coming over tomorrow to have dinner with me at my house. My parents may come down for a visit sometime this week and a few of my co-workers are coming out to have lunch with me on Friday. I am so thankful for all of the support and I just need to refocus on that!
I also want to give a big shout-out to Tim, once again. Not only does he have the stress of learning a new job and having to do ALL of the work around the house, he also has to put up with crazy old me! Poor guy came home last night to me in tears, insisting that I was totally fine and just having a bad day! If any of his "boys" are reading this blog, I've promised him a guys weekend whenever he wants after the babies are here wherever he wants -- our house, Chicago, Vegas, etc. I know this won't even begin to "thank" him for all he has done, but at least it can give him something to look forward to, also! :-)
Ok, enough babble. I am fine, the babies are fine, Tim is great (I think) and we will get through this. I'm just having a rough week for some reason. . . actually, now that I think about it I normally get these winter 'blues', so compound it with the fact that I'm stuck on bedrest and it is no wonder I'm a basket case these days! :-) Just four more weeks until our big goal . . . we can make it!
Love you all!
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